Please wash your hands before reading my blog. It's just good hygiene

I found a twenty dollar bill in my coat pocket. I tried to come up with some things I could do with the money, and this is what I came up with.

1. Go up to the bell ringer for the salvation army, open my wallet and say, "Oh, all i've got is a twenty." then walk away.

2. Buy some crystal meth for 20 bucks, then turn aournd and sell it for 21 bucks. I'll then write a letter to Donald Trump telling him of my savy business skills and get on the apprentice. Once I'm on the show I'll get fired in the fourth round. I'll sue Donald for being racist and settle out of court for $80,000. Then I'll write a letter to Martha Stewart asking her to be on the Martha Stewart apprentice, telling her how I turned twenty bucks into $80,000. She will turn me down and i'll be mad at her. I'll still buy her cookbook though.

3. Invest it in L.A Gear.

4. Tithe 20% to the church. I'll then go back the next week and ask for two dollars back since I only need to give 10%

5. I got an e-mail saying that I can buy a degree online. I might get two.

6. I'll get twenty dollars in pennies and throw them as hard as I can at a homeless guy. It might hurt, but I think he'll be grateful for the money.

I am attempting to blog again. The thoughts and opinions on this page only represent myself and in no other way represent the thoughts of anyone else. Except Indonesia.

Today I was pooping and came up with a list of the top 986 funniest people of all time. Guess who came in 7th. Just look at those glasses, hilarious.



On a side note, I also came up with the top 123,862 coolest people of all time. Ghandi came in at a respectable 34th. I came in at 33rd.